“I was born and raised in Tirunelveli and moved to Ambasamudram for my 11th and 12th grade. I did a lot of temporary government jobs. Right from the Cuddalore Collector office to Chengalpat Medical college. I then wrote and cleared the TNPC exam to find a permanent government job and my office was in Taramani. It’s been over a decade since I retired.
I got married in 1977 and have two daughters. Both of them are married and the younger one is currently expecting a baby. So, I keep shuttling between her home and mine to take care of her. I was born in a generation where we were taught to mend things when they break rather than throw them away or complain about how it doesn’t suit our fancies. So, we applied the same principles even to live and made sure the boat of our relationship kept sailing.
Both my husband and I were working and he made sure all the responsibilities in the house were shared. My daughters were raised to believe that running the house is not just one person’s responsibility. However, that doesn’t mean my husband and I fight over issues like what is whose job.
My husband listens and does everything I ask him to, despite all these years of marriage. His short temper rubs me on the wrong side at times. However, that’s only a rare occurrence because he’s been a very patient person, not just with me but everyone I’ve known. He’s someone who knows how to adjust with others and react in understanding with the situation.
We barely fight or have arguments because both of us adjust and act by the interest of each other. A lot of kids in today’s generation might find this offensive and ask why do I have to change. I just have one advice for them all. If you think the relationship matters, adjusting will not be a problem. For instance, you consider your job, friends and parents important, so changing your ways to suit them doesn’t seem like a burden, so why is it so wrong to make changes in your habits for the person you’ve married.
This applies to both men and women. At work also people force you to change the way you are. Everything, from the clothes you wear to the food you eat, to the time you wake up is decided by them. And we do it all for money. So, why not spend a few days as a trial and do the same at home? Why not adjust a little for the person you married and see how that changes your life?”
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