“I grew up in a house where domestic violence was largely normalised. We lived in a joint family and it was a common sight to see the men in the family trash and beat up their wives and kids. There have been countless days when I’ve had to watch my mom, aunts, female cousins, writhe in pain. I still vividly remember how one of the cousins I grew up with, was beat up almost every day because she dared to love another man outside our caste/religion.
As a kid, grappling with this was hard because no one in the family even acknowledged the fact that this was wrong. It was normalised to the extent that it was, sort of expected out of the male members of the family. I did get lucky because my generation siblings and I were loved enough to not have had to go through trauma in a similar manner but all of that violence gave birth to a sort of chronic anxiety in me, which at the time I obviously had no clue of. Like thousands of kids and teens in our country, I had,(sometimes still do) low self-esteem, stage fear and very hard time focusing on things. Those screams and tears haunted me for days and it took an almost devastating breakup from a seven-year relationship to move my attention to my severe anxiety and rage issues.
In a way though, all of this manifested into making a fierce person who did finally find the courage to stand up against all that violence and speak up and today I am relieved to say that, my family has come a long way from what it used to be! In the process of finding a release for all my pent up anger, I resolved to become independent and find the life partner I would lead this life with!
This deep rooted aspiration was a part of the reason, I chose to kiss the skies and fulfil my dream of flying high. I cannot lie, fighting my own fears and apprehensions, I had a hard time flying, during the initial months. It has taken me years of healing and self-forgiveness to be where I am today, in my mind’s eye.
I can say with a little pride and lot of gratitude today, I am a pilot with a kick-ass airline, braved my own journey of hiccups and obstacles, only to be happily married today, to the person of anyone’s dreams. I am also a part of a vegan food start-up which caters to pastries and other delicacies, soon to be serving lots of delicacies from the vegan world. And there’s so much more I want to do with my life, than what my demons in my head told me I could.
What happens inside four walls of a domestic household may not be in our control but we owe it to ourselves to make a better life than what was offered and am glad to announce that, I have made a pretty decent job out of it. Of course, this current life I’m living is a result of the backing of many of the beautiful souls who have stood with me and for that, I am grateful forever!”
#Family #Childhood #Hardships #DomesticViolence #Trauma #Anxiety #Mentalhealth #Breakup #Relationship #Standup #Life #Marriage #Husband #Supportsystem #Pilot #Journey #Happiness #Inspire #Madras #HumansofMadras